Today we went on a family outing to Costco. We needed eggs and lunch meat for Matt to take for work. We got in and out of there spending less than we’ve ever spent and had sample lunch from all of the sample people. Yum. We shared a chicken stick and frozen yogurt, or what I like to call “poor parents dining out”, and sat at the bright red picnic tables among the other parents of small children. It was an absolute zoo. We’ve traded our leisurely Saturday afternoons dangling off patios drinking cold beer for a chicken stick and froyo among other weary parents just like us. *sigh*
We chit chatted back and forth and took turns passing Quinn to each other to keep her from having one of her huge public meltdowns. She seems to enjoy chaos and looking around at people so all was good on our little corner of the picnic table.
When we were almost done with our super fancy meal out food, I heard a loud “crack” right behind us. Then I heard an audible gasp. The little boy that had been using the picnic table as his own personal jungle gym had fallen backwards and smacked the back of his head on the concrete floor. His mother scooped him up just as quickly as he had fallen. He was at that point in a major fall where kids appear to be crying but no sound comes out for what seems like an eternity. Everyone scrambled to help and some nice man was right there with ice very quickly.
She was holding her now screaming child when he got to them with the ice. She said “No thanks”.
I was confused. The child obviously needs ice on his bumped noggin. He was clearly in pain. It couldn’t have hurt to just take the ice that the man brought her. I looked at Matt and told him I didn’t understand why she didn’t just politely take the ice. I started to get a little irritated by it. Her kid had been wreaking havoc on the picnic area the entire time we were there. She had to know it was coming. So why, if she basically sat there and did nothing while her child hurt himself, didn’t she just take the damn ice?
Matt said “Maybe she’s embarrassed”.
That hadn’t even crossed my mind. Maybe she was embarrassed.
But she shouldn’t have been.
I can already tell my kid is going to be a royal pain in the ass on a good day. She’s high maintenance and she’s only been on this earth >4 months. She has meltdowns almost everywhere we go and I feel the stares on me. I feel like people think I don’t feed her, change her when she’s wet/dirty, or meet her general needs, even though I try my best to and she sure doesn’t go hungry.
Look at this face
You wouldn’t think she’s much trouble.
You’d be wrong.
We love her anyway.
Since becoming a mother, I’ve had to accept help. I must have “new” stamped on my forehead, and I’ve had many people offer to hold doors open for me while I struggle with the awkward stroller. At first, I’d say “I got it!” with a smile. Now, I usually give an exhausted “Thank you”.
I’ve found that people generally trip over themselves to help, which says a lot about the world we live in. People see you struggling and help. We should be open to letting them.
Next time mama, take the ice. It may be my kid with the banged up head the next go-round. We’re all down in the trenches together with this parenting thing. Nice to know we have people willing to lend that third hand we sometimes so desperately need.